I'm a fixer.... and i readily admit it!

At what point do people, certain ones in particular feel they are entitled to everything on a silver platter when they haven't earned or worked for it.

Yep, you guessed it....another post about my ex-roomie.

Yesterday was my breaking point. He spoke with me but all he could say is how i have ruined everything and he has to go fix the f- ups that i made, i'm an f-ing retard, and so you can imagine what the lash out contained. I don't want to talk to him anymore because i don't deserve that treatment in anyway, and he should have taken care of such issues before he left my apartment instead of me having to take care of it on Tuesday. I realize more and more that i was his fixer. Whenever he had a problem or an issue i would appear and fix it, whether it be monetary, emotionally, or whatever else. People that are fixers usually get taken for granted and that's what has happened here. I have helped him so much that now that i won't help him he doesn't like it and everything is my fault. WRONG AGAIN! His problems are not my problems, it's very immature to lash out to someone because they have rinsed their hands of your bs. In reality the people that are fixers should get a giant repetitive thank you for all that they have done to make the life of the person they helped easier.

Then comes the point though, if you constantly are a fixer for these people not only do they depend on you to fix their next set of problems but they also become dependent on you for the wrong reasons. The fixers get used and abused because they are good hearted people that have a hard time saying no. It's the truth. No for some reason is in our vocabulary but not at the top of the list or even near the top. We do whatever we can to assist and help at all costs. There is a price to pay though. When you come to your breaking point and you start saying no to those that are dependent you better be prepared for being cursed at, shunned, and ridiculed for no reason, just because you won't fix their problems. At some points it's hurtful and others all i can do is laugh and say "Wow look at how immature this person is," to myself.

It comes to a point where I say ok fine, this is how it's going to be: I can't have you in my life because you damage my feelings and self esteem, you are destroying your own life and i don't want to be taken down in your tailspin, and the only relevant solution is to eliminate you from my life. Yeah it makes me sound like the bad guy in some ways but in others, it's a weight off my shoulders and i can move on and focus on my own struggles and battles. So for those of you reading this that are fixers, please look at the situations you are fixing for these people and consider: is it really worth it? do i get treated properly? is the person that i am fixing for appreciative? and a few other questions but these are the main ones. If the answer is no then you have some serious thinking to do as to who stays in your life and wreaks havoc or who is a valuable friend to have in your life.