the art of racing in the rain

The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


so everyone starts their review for this book by saying "wow it was written from a dog's perspective", and i agree with that but i also think it's a wonderful and challenging way to write a book. since we can only imagine what dogs think about our mannerisms it was refreshing to see how Stein gave enzo the personal qualities of a human. i loved the philosophy that enzo believed and even better that he states he watched it on national geographic. enzo's owner denny had more then the average rough go. he loses his wife, he almost loses his daughter (well he does for a significant amount of time), and then he loses his dog.this also brought to life the philosophy that things happen in threes. enzo has a vibrant personality and witty comments and actions that he thinks and does are what truly gives him an amazing character. he's a dog with morals and values and he certainly believes in karma, or king karma as he calls it. the ending of this story was a well rounded closure to a beautifully told tale. you really don't want the story to end but when it does you kind of channel the character of denny and are able to take a breath and smile.

ONE OF MY FAV PARTS- how enzo described taking the ride in the car on the race track. bark twice if you want to go faster .............ruff,ruff!



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THE HELP

The Help by Kathryn Stockett

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


this was a wonderful book. my personal thought was that the author, kathryn stockett, channeled the character of miss skeeter. the author has all the same qualities that miss skeeter's character has. i thought it was very very interesting that she would write a book from a perspective that she could relate to. i loved the characters of aibileen and minny. hilly had me disliking her right from the start. hilly got what she deserved and it still doesn't change her thoughts or anything, she is stuck in her racist mode. i really enjoyed the character of lil man and how he liked to hide things, like silverware, toys, etc., in his diaper and his crib. mae mobley developed into a well rounded un-racist child and that is all thanks to aibileen. well told story and definitely surpassed my expectations. the writing style was not magnificent but i will let that pass bc towards the end it was hard to put down.



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GIMPY-FIED = A WARY BRAIN

I APOLOGIZE BEFORE I EVEN START BC I CANNOT TYPE PROPERLY AS IT IS ONLY WITH ONE HAND. THERE MAY BE SOME GRAMMATICAL ERRORS AS WELL AS SOME CONSTRUCTUAL ERRORS BUT I'M DOING THE BEST WITH WHAT I'VE GOT.

Situation-

i was at work when i fell in the playground. I heard/ felt a snap in my right ankle. I thought that i would be alright and that i just needed to take my time getting up. As i tried to get up things went hazy and i passed out. I woke up wondering where i was and soon came to the realization that i had fallen at work. The 911 services were called and some firemen and the ambulance arrived. I was put in a temporary leg splint and wrist splint and i was ferried away to the nearest hospital, which happens to be 5 – 10 minutes from work.

Mental situation -

at the time of the incident all i could think of was “wow, you're such an idiot for doing this at work.” apologies flew out of my mouth faster then breaths. I was sorry about absolutely everything. You name it, i was sorry about it. I was worried that my job might fire me bc of the occurrence. I was afraid of how i looked. I was worried that the kids would be afraid of the people that would have to come help me. I wanted to be strong for the kids more then for myself. I was bombarded with negative judgements and put downs. Positivity was not an option. My brain was speeding out of control, thoughts progressing through faster and faster with no chance of slowing down.

Aftermath -

i have a sprained wrist which i believe is more then a sprain. I have a bone chip/fractured ankle. I have a splint on my wrist that cost $30 and a huge walking aircast on my ankle that cost $190. i have a prescription for pain meds that i only will take at night bc i don't want to be a zombie during the day. I am dependent on whoever is talking care of me. I can't hardly pull up my underwear and pants after going to the washroom. I don't walk i waddle. I personify what i would consider GIMPY-FIED. I am as useless as a fifth tit on a goat. I'm frustrated. I hate that i am dependent but i will do whatever it takes to keep going through this. I am not planning ahead to next week or the week after, i am trying to just get through today. Then, when i lay my head down to sleep, i go to never never land and i get up the next morning to do it all again. I hope that from some of the things i learned the day before i can refine how i do certain things, ie. Putting clothing on, so that it is a little easier then before. I waste my days (so far 2.5 days) watching movies and majority of them are bad. I can't put my hair up on my own and my mum has been doing an awesome job of being my hair dresser. The good things are few and far between but when they're there they make a giant difference. A delicious bowl of whole wheat white cheddar mac & cheese is comforting like a warm blanket. My cat, Zoe, watches over me at night when i sleep. I fall asleep petting her giving myself a different type of therapy. My other cat, Abby, is complete sass giving me dirty looks and avoiding being outside. She makes me chuckle a little bit. for live entertainment, she's pretty boring but it's the small things she does that bring a smile to my face. My mum brushing my hair gives me a touch of peace, just like listening to a waterfall. The coolness of a sip of water takes any sign of parching away. The words of my therapist “it is what it is” are a constant mantra to keep me from beating myself up with berating thoughts and ideas. The hum of the air conditioner and computer keep me grounded. My eyes are heavy and my body is week but not ready for the calm of sleep.

STATEMENT OF FACT: THERE ARE 2 THINGS IN LIFE THAT WILL NEVER LET ME DOWN. MY MUM AND MY BLOG. BOTH OFFER MY TROUBLED MIND SANCTUARY IN TROUBLED TIMES. THANKS FOR BEING THERE CONSTANTLY.

Lunch In Paris

Lunch in Paris: A Love Story, with Recipes by Elizabeth Bard

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


This was a delightful read. The words were like a comforting meal making you feel cozy and warm. The descriptions were written with great care and love. While you are on a journey that involves dishes that might belong in heaven, there is the descriptions of the wonderful city of Paris. Not only was the adventure in the Louvre just like one that i have taken in my imagination but it took all the poignant pictures to history and gave them a personality of their own. The Mona Lisa with that peculiar smile as if she is hiding something...but what? Only she would know! The glass pyramid constructed by IM PEI that gathers sunlight and makes it glaze over the floor of the modern day museum. It was wonderful and it was like the perfect journey to Paris only without having to leave your home, your comfortable surroundings. Pure bliss.



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A Case of Need

A Case of Need by Michael Crichton

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I enjoyed this book bc it was about the taboo topic of abortion. The characters were well developed and the main character of John Berry was interesting to follow. Another thing i really enjoyed about this book was the scattering of medical jargon within the text. It was like a reality episode of ER or some other popular medical drama. Although i have seen the subject of an abortion going wrong and the patient dying, this was a very good perception. The one thing that wasn't believable was the timeline. I highly doubt that all of the content could have happened within a week, and that made it a little less believable. The ending was a little predictable but was decent and packed with lots of action, which made me want to keep reading and finish.



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Carriers by Patrick Lynch

Carriers by Patrick Lynch

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


This book is advertised as comparable to Hot Zone by Richard Preston. The only similarity between the two books is that they both involve serious viruses that are terminal. The layout of the book was poor and the characters and story line were very bland. I am being quite harsh with this book because Hot Zone is my all time favourite and it's very hard to beat. I did like the twist this book took when the Indian government sent the soldiers in to find the girls and irradicate the illness by killing it's carriers/host. That was very interesting and indepth. As for the ending, it was very unbelievable and silly.



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I deserve better

I've never felt so under appreciated and unwanted as now. It all started yesterday and has rapidly declined.

Dad spoke to me early in the morn yesterday and said, “I haven't seen you all week. I would like to have you over for dinner.” I said sure and was looking forward to that. I knew that he had a prior engagement to help a friend with a job. Around 137pm i receive a message on my voicemail saying “Hi Sarah! I'm going to X's for dinner. Bye.”

I WAS PISSED. Dad made a huge song and dance that he hadn't seen me all week and that we would reconnect at dinner. When i was going through my issues with drugs, I did this to him several times. I relive it constantly all the time as it still gets thrown in my face what a bad daughter i was.(i was bad, i'm not denying it but i have learned from my mistakes and had to pay for it dearly.) So when my dad does it to me he thinks that he should just get away with it and that whatever excuse he throws out should be acceptable. So i was being assertive today and i told him that i did not like how he treated me yesterday and reminded him that when i did that to him it was a big production. He asked, “What was i supposed to do? I said i was going to help my friend and i couldn't let him down.” I said, “I realize that but when the friend mentioned that he was going to X's for dinner that Dad should have said No thanks i have plans with Sarah. But no he couldn't do that. He bailed on me and now thinks that i have no reason to be mad or anything.

Today.
I have had my ASSERTIVE discussion with dad and i had to say that i was hanging up the phone because i could not deal with him being indecisive and changing plans every 2 minutes. He was also saying things that were not pertinent to what we were talking about and just spewing random stuff. I had a cold shower and i decided that i did not have enough clothes to choose from for golf tomorrow. I had a pile of laundry that was clean at dad's house so i was going over to get it. I get to his house and i open the door and there is no one in the house. So i grab my laundry and leave a note and decide that i am going to see if he is down with his new 'friends'. Of course he sees me there and he starts heading back to his apt on his bike. I GROW MORE LIVID THEN I ALREADY WAS. I get more mad and i consider driving away but then he start waving me into a parking spot. I lost it. I was just like, “Holy you can't be without these people for 2 seconds. I just spoke to you about this.” He starts with the useless excuses as to why it's ok and that he has his reasons.

Then i hit the nail on the head. I said that I am tired of being put second best to people that aren't even his fucking family. He puts these people on a pedestal yet he dumps all over the people he says he considers important. I call my mum to vent and she starts to tell me how it is and that she knows what it's like because she put up with this treatment for 30 years and she finally put her foot down.

The thing that my therapist says that stays with me constantly is that “JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE FAMILY DOESN”T MEAN YOU HAVE TO PUT UP WITH SHIT”. This is an example that i am going to use it. I am putting my foot down. I am a person and i deserve to be treated like one. I don't need him to keep doing this. It's clearly evident that he does not want to spend time with me, more like it's a chore for him. So fine, I won't be around to do that. I am just going to do what i need, and at this time I need to stand up for myself and be assertive.