Thoughts of Last Weekend to Now...

Dear Reader,

This is not going to be an updates session like it has been in the past. I have a few things that I would really like to share with you.

My Friend Meghan Ray’s Blog

My friend Meg in the not too long ago past has started a blog. I was searching around Facebook, or the Force as I like to call it, and realized there were links on Meg’s page that I wanted to explore. So being the curious cat that I am….I did. To my amazement I found that Meg had started a blog. This blog is amazing. It doesn’t yet have a lot of posts but the writing is something worth reading. She had me captivated just by the simple use of figures of speech and things that she wrote about. I can’t give enough praise because I found what I read really interesting yet informative. Almost like my blog, Meg’s is a jumble of things put together involving really life situations, past situations and ideas that have come into her head. The writing is what struck me because I had never known that Meg was a writer. She has a talent that everyone should and will notice the minute they read her titles to the posts. I am going to pass along the link so that everyone can get a look at how well she is doing. Being a writer that has just come into my own in the recent times, I find it really refreshing how much Meg enjoys blogging and wants to share with us as readers. KUDOS to you Meg!

http://www.stay-at-home-chaos.blogspot.com/
Next is the link to her son's blog which she writes really regularly. It's good for a different point of a view!
http://www.koolaidan.blogspot.com/

Thoughts of the Past Came to the Forefront Last Night

Last night I got up for a midnight snack of a drumstick… you know those fabulous ice cream cone with the chocolate lining on the inside and a caramel centre while the top ice cream cone is covered in wonderful chocolate and nuts. For some reason I checked my computer to see what was going on, I very rarely check the comp while getting up in the middle of the night, yet this has been the second time that I have done this in the last while. Anywho! I went on to the computer and did my thing and then as I was heading back to bed I started thinking about PHIL. Yep that Phil that I have written about several times before, the person that I consider my one that I have now lost forever. What I thought was that the few times I go to my mum’s house (another rare occasion), especially in the last while, I have made a conscious effort to not go and look at the cards we had sent to each other, the notes from our valentines day in Niagara falls and such. I have been trying so hard to put these thoughts out of my mind for various reasons that it sort of made me sad that I want to erase such an important person and time in my life. This guy I thought, and to this day still think, is the ONE. Maybe the reason I want to erase it from my memory banks is because I made a lot of screw ups, some out of my control, that actually led to the loss of such an important person. I mean I felt love for this guy like I have never loved before. I know the best thing to do is to think about the good times, and yeah I am lucky to have known what a real power/force REAL love is like. Unfortunately, Phil wants no contact with me whatsoever, I have requested him on the Force several times and still no response. I know I sound like I haven’t let go of the past but I don’t want to let go knowing him as a person…do I?

Last Weekend

Last weekend 3 young men ages (20-21) were killed on a road I frequently travel in Uxbridge. The story is: They were on the way home from the bar and the driver had said that he was fine to drive. He had driven all the way from Oshawa and was cruising along the road at high speeds in the above mentioned area. His family believes that since the other two fellows were in the back of the vehicle sleeping the driver had fallen asleep at the wheel and ended crashing the vehicle into a tree. The driver and one of the sleeping passengers were killed when the EMS crew arrived at the scene and unfortunately had to be pronounce them dead. The third passenger, the friend that brought the other two together as friends, he is in a coma in a hospital in Toronto. Word is that he came out of the coma at some point but then the doctors put him back into a coma to alleviate pain and try and bring some of the swelling within his brain down. The police say that it was a combination of speed and alcohol that led to the horrific end. The family says it was sleep. Now I am not going to argue who’s right and who’s wrong, after all these are just guesses. No one really knows what happened and no one ever will, not even the young man fighting for his life. With the passing of such young men that were as the papers stated, ‘well known’, the younger population of the town has been brought into a down spiral of sadness and other emotions. I feel for the men that passed and I feel for their families, girlfriends, and friends. Losing someone so young is an unbearable thought. In memory of the young fellows, which I did not know, but feel sorry for them being unable to live their lives to the fullest I am going to write the lyrics of one of my favourite songs. I have written them before but repetition is not always a bad thing.

“What Sarah Said” by Death Cab for Cutie, from the album Plans

And it came to than that every plan is a tiny prayer to Father Time
As I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409
And I rationed my breaths as I said to myself that I’d already taken too much today
As each descending peak on the LCD took you a little farther away from me

Amongst the vending machines and year-old magazines in a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind that our memories depend on a faulty camera in our minds
But I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose than to have never lain beside at all
And I looked around at all the eyes on the ground as the TV entertained itself

‘Cause there’s no comfort in the waiting room
Just nervous pacers bracing for bad news
And then the nurse comes round and everyone will lift their heads
But I’m thinking of what Sarah said:
That “Love is watching someone die”

So who’s gonna watch you die?

Last but not least I would like to end this blog post on two quotes that I found that both say a lot. I hope you dear reader find the same comfort in them as I did.

“The world is full of obvious things which nobody by and chance observes.”
- From the book “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time” by Mark Haddon

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson